It’s time to get yourself a new book

i.e. this one that I wrote

Hello, FFOREST friends

My book Burrito Van on Selsley Common: Stories and Pictures is finally available to own!

I would very much like you to buy it because
it’s a beautifully designed book
full of good stories.
Three of them,
Burrito Van on Selsley Common,
Little Silver Fish and
Doris and Doug’s Home for Useless Things
and Custom Pod Shop,
were first published in TREE.
The rest will be new to you.

Another reason to buy my book is to meet
The Trout of Destiny.

I’m proud of this book
and I think you’ll love it.
But you don’t have to take my word for it:

‘I’m not much of a reader, but this book has a bunch of drawings and a lot of white space, so 10 thumbs up from me!’

— Jack ‘Toothless Jim’ Horner, owner and proprietor of Toothless Jim’s DIY Dentistry and Prosthetic Thumb Emporium

I guess the only question now is, do you want to buy the Kindle or paperback version? Let me help you decide.

Reasons to buy the paperback:

1. It will fill that unsightly gap at the top left of your bookshelf.

2. The spine is green. I bet you don’t have many books with green spines.

3. A couple hours’ respite from the constant presence of illuminated screens. It’s too late to save your vision, but your failing eyes will appreciate the rest.

4. Phoebe Weston’s gorgeous cover art is best appreciated as ink on paper.

5. It looks exactly how I want it to. The words don’t slide around or change size just because the ‘reader’ has an ‘idea’ about what font is ‘nicer’ to read.

6. That old joke about how an iPad is an expensive way to prop up a wonky table/swat a wasp/protect your antique sideboard from drink stains/stop a bullet when you keep it in your breast pocket during World War II.

7. You will own a painstakingly-designed physical manifestation of the fruits of my imagination that you can actually hold in your hand and

8. drop into the school jumble sale donation box so your conscience will stop with its ‘I should be more involved in my kids’ education’ nagging.

9. It will keep you entertained for about as long as a movie but it costs less than a cinema ticket. Plus, if people are willing to wait, everyone in your house or even your neighbourhood can have that same movie-length enjoyment without paying a single penny.

10. Or you could rent it to them. There’s a nice little earner for you.

Reasons to buy the Kindle version:

1. I get three times the royalties when you choose Kindle

2. but buy the paperback because it’s lovely.

3. Buying both is fine too.

A thing to remember:

When you become a paying FFOREST subscriber, you get the paperback version plus these sweet additional benefits:

• You will help expand the reach of FFOREST

• Skyler and I will be encouraged and humbled by your belief in our work

• You will have to wait an extra week to get the book

• The title page will be defaced by me

• You will pay nearly 10 times the regular retail price

TREE is back tomorrow!

Happiness
Jeff