🫶FIELD GUIDE 60: Authentically you

Once upon a time, I was an only grandchild. And then this guy came along and foiled all my plans to be spoiled for the rest of my life. Cousin status aside, Patrick is one of my best friends, and in true cousinly fashion, will happily beat me up (even though he says I’m the mean and scary one). Patrick spends his time chasing the ocean waves with his dog, making split decisions that always end up working in his favor, and working his tail off.

Patrick, like a lot of us, struggles with being unsure, depression, anxiety, and all the mean things his brain can tell him sometimes. What we’ve come to know is that it is important to always find yourself again.

Name

Patrick Grimes

Location

Virginia

Occupation

Dog sitter, server/bartender

Soundtrack

(Spotify)

Testing testing, is this thing on? How do I write about myself without sounding like a total idiot and when you feel like your life is not that impressive?

This past week has been the worst week of the year (Thanks, I’ll be here all year).

But seriously, how does starting off the new year perfectly, surrounded by your best friend, her husband, your amazing cousin & her family… turn to such… chaos… thank you medication!

Fun fact; this is what happens when your body has been running non stop for months and finally hits a wall & the ick that you’ve repressed comes back up. Now, why am I sharing this with you you may ask? Because that’s me. Over sharer 101. Sometimes life gets messy. Sometimes your brain is public enemy #1 and you start to question everything. But, the light is coming. And this will be my year, dammit.

When your therapist says, “Have you started any new medications lately?” And suddenly the light bulb goes off making you realize why you’ve been crying for the last 24 hours spontaneously at the drop of a hat. You realize, “Oh, these meds aren’t working for me.” So, after 15 days, my normal dread and normal anxiety have come back — this is manageable-ish to a point.

When you’re setting yourself up for a successful year, it can very much change in a heart beat. Therapy, gym, eating better — it can all go to hell and a hand basket. But there are some key pieces I’ve taken away from this healing journey I’ve been on for the last couple of years. Let’s get into it.

Change is inevitable, so it keeps happening but it’s throwing curveballs constantly.

The biggest change, for me, that’s happened in the last few years has been leaving a job that I was at for almost 7 years and getting started in a whole new field — restaurants.

That may have been the biggest, scariest change in the moment but looking back, it’s something that needed to be done to enter into this new era of my life.

So hi, I’m Patrick, I am 27, I now wait tables and bartend in Old Town Alexandria. I have a successful dog walking and pet sitting business that I manage myself. I have a dog and his name is Wilbur and he just turned 8 in December — He might be the love of my life.

The last few years have been freaking wild. Life just seems to do whatever the hell it wants to and I’m just along for the ride.

Life is messy. So, buckle up buttercup.

When shit hits the fan, who do you call?

I call my mom. Or text. Whichever is easier in the moment.  Having people (not just my mom) who are your rocks, helps immensely when the world keeps changing. To find people in your life you can call when your world is crumbling, that is what makes the world go round. I’ve learned a lot lately about friendships and relationships and have been humbled largely but also been treated with the utmost love and respect by people I’ve known less than a year. Times change, people come and go and the real ones stick by your side.

I’ve been dog walking since I was 15, that makes 12 years and counting. Yes, pet sitting neighbor’s birds and cats in the condo I grew up in even before then because that’s who I was — who I still am today.

I’ve thought about moving out of my parent’s basement (shoutout to Susan & John!) but where’s the fun in that when I can move into client’s houses for a week or two weeks at a time and play house in someone else’s house?! It’s kinda fun. It can also be lonely in some aspects but playing house is more fun than not. To move, relocate, and leave the years of ground work I’ve put into this business would certainly be hard to replicate anywhere else.

I’m quite happy with my two jobs even if it means I’m not as flush in cash as I’d like to be (thank you credit card debt).

I’ve recently done some “cleaning house” in my personal life, if you will, and most of it was just thrusted upon me with little to no choice in the matter when it comes to friendships. Losing people that you thought would be in your life for forever, is a big eye opener best explained as, “Holy shit, now what?”

Well I’ll tell you now what, you have the slate wiped clean and are able to find and hand pick the people who truly bring you joy and make you want to be the best version of yourself. Thanking someone feels weird since they caused the big shit show of 2023 but a big shoutout to them for catapulting this new chapter of my life forward. I’ve since learned a lot in that moment and am able to now see that life does go on.

I’m still a work in progress. Isn’t everyone? Life can be chaotic but more than not, I try to be in the moment and not let the fears and anxiety of the future keep me from living my true authentic self.