💷 TREE 400: Not feeling it
One.
“What do you think? There was a man who had two sons. He went to the first and said, ‘Son, go and work today in the vineyard.’
“ ‘I will not,’ he answered, but later he changed his mind and went.
“Then the father went to the other son and said the same thing. He answered, ‘I will, sir,’ but he did not go.
“Which of the two did what his father wanted?”
“The first,” they answered.
— Jesus chatting with some religious leaders (Matthew 21:28–31, NIV)
Let me tell you about last Friday. I woke up thinking about another classroom full of murdered children in my home country, about my sister who is a teacher there, about the UK government getting away with partying against their own pandemic rules while people died alone, about the ongoing struggle to get my daughter the therapeutic help she needs. I listened to Arcade Fire’s new album which is perfect but not really a mood booster. I swore at Adobe (the bloated corporation with a stranglehold on the creative software industry). I swore at a co-worker. (They didn’t know. I was working from home.) I swore at the broken mental healthcare system. I just swore in general. To calm down, I talked with Christine about how our local community decided to ban teenagers from celebrating the end of school on the beach over the weekend because god forbid kids act like kids in public.
Also, I did a full and productive day’s work to finish a very full and productive week. I was polite to my team and my clients. I got the information I needed to take the next step to getting my daughter the help she needs.
Was my mood stinky on Friday? Yes.
Did I do good things anyway? Yes.
What I did made it a win.
Obviously, life is better when your mood is good. But your mood won’t always be good. You know you’re going to do the right thing anyway, so give yourself permission to be stinky once in a while.
Two.
Today is the day that Samuel Trowsers finally decides to do something about his weak arms.
Three.
Saxophone + dance = get you moving on a Tuesday morning.
Here’s an interesting Jewish perspective on feeling and believing and doing.
Do the things you know are right and you’ll keep growing slowly even when your mood isn’t cooperating.
Jeff
Whew, thank you for this. I have had to write some weekly newsletters on days I was struggling and felt in some ways like they weren’t what I wanted to write. I needed to get this - that I can write on the not so great days too and it can be ok. In fact those posts sometimes seem to resonante more which kind of amazes me.
Feelings are escalating with Evil. My place in humanity is to love myself really good and others as well. But me first. My inner work is to be steady. I also carve stillness time. Sitting still is an artform. I’m learning slowly. You?🐢🐢🐢